January 23rd, 2010 by admin
Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor in India and said: “Doctor I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated fully within this period.”
Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic, see that board.
Man: No, Doctor, I have come to you only.
Doctor: But, gentleman I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist. I do not treat human beings.
Man: I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only.Doctor: I can not, because you speak like me, think like me, talk like me which means you are a human being and not an animal.
Man: I know I am a human but listen to my complaints first:
Doctor: OK. Tell me.
Man: I sleep vigilantly like a dog thinking about my work load whole night.
I get up in the morning like a horse, I go to work running like a deer
I work all the day like a donkey
I run around for 11 months like a bull without any holiday.
I wag my tail in front of all my bosses
I play with my children like a monkey if I get time.
I am like a rabbit before my wife
Doctor: are you an Accountant?
Man: Yes
Doctor: Instead of telling this long history you should have told me in the beginning itself that you are an accountant. Come man, no one can treat you better than me.
January 23rd, 2010 by admin
A husband comes home from church; he greets his wife and lifts her up and carries her around the house.
The wife is so surprised and asks “Did the pastor preach about being romantic?”
The husband said, “No! He said we must carry our burdens and sorrows!”
January 22nd, 2010 by admin
Santa’s wife had bought a beautiful sweater for her husband.
She sent it to her husband by parcel post along with a note.
The note said : ‘ The buttons of the sweater are removed since they where too heavy and added to the postage.You will find them in the right hand pocket of the sweater.
January 22nd, 2010 by admin
Once I was asked by my Friend, “What is the secret behind your happy
married life?”I said, “You should share responsibilities with due love
andRespect each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems.”He asked,
“Can you explain?”I said, “In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues
where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each
other’s decisions.”Still not convinced, Friend asked me “Give me some
examples”I said,” Smaller issues like, which car we should buy, how much
amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner,
refrigerator , monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are
decided by my wife. I just agree to it”He asked, “Then what is your role?”I
said,” My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America
should attack Iran, whether Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe,
whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire,
etc etc and Do you know one thing,My wife NEVER, EVER objects to any of
these”
January 21st, 2010 by admin
A gentleman is one who never swears at his wife while ladies are present.