Hilarious jokes-Dinner

Hilarious jokes-Dinner

Sandra said to her husband Pete, “Should I make Pasta or Risotto tonight?”

Peter made a face and said sarcastically, “You prepare it first, we will think of a name for it later.”

 

What worries you more?

What worries you more?

This girl called Anita in my gym went to see her family doctor for her diet plan.

Anita said to the doc,”My worry is my height and not how much I weigh.”

The doctor was surprised and asked, “And why is that?”

Anita replied, “If you go by my weight, I should be 7 feet and 5 inches tall!”

 

 

Fastest rejection

Fastest rejection

Robbie encountered the fastest rejection ever in his life.

He was trying to warm up with the Janie, the pretty girl in his class. When he asked her how many brothers she had, Janie replied promptly, “Four including you.”

 

Santa Banta jokes-A million dollars

Santa Banta jokes-A million dollars

Santa Singh says to his friend Banta Singh, “I will give a million dollars to whoever fulfills my desire.”

Banta Singh asked him, “What is your desire?”

Santa Singh replies, “To receive 2 million dollars.”

 

 

 

Joke of the day-Blind beggar

Joke of the day-Blind beggar

Anna and her husband Tom were walking down the street when a beggar called out to her and said, “Hey beautiful lady, can you please spare a dollar for a blind homeless man.”

 

Tom said to Anna, “Give him a dollar. He is really blind!”

Funny jokes-Reverse mechanism

Funny jokes-Reverse mechanism

At a leading newspaper’s office, Robin asked his boss, “Do you think I should put some fire into my articles.”

The boss replied with sarcasm, “It might help if you do the reverse.”

 

Santa Singh’s wish

Santa Singh’s wish

Santa Singh meditated hard on the Himalayas seeking blessings from God. God was pleased and said to him, “I shall grant you a wish. Ask.”

Santa said, “I want wings so I can fly.”

God said, “That is against nature. I cannot grant you that. Ask for something else.”

Santa said, “I want to read my wife’s mind. She is very quarrelsome, so if I read her mind, I can avoid many such situations.”

God said, “What was you first wish again?”

 

 

Most dangerous animal

Most dangerous animal

Tanu : Which is the most dangerous animal in India?

Manu (after thinking for a while): According to me, it is the deer.

Tanu: Deer? Are you crazy? Even a pet dog is more dangerous than a deer.

Manu: From Satyug (old times) to Kalyug (modern times), over a period of nearly five thousand years, the deer has caused the most trouble to people in India – right from *Shri Ram to Salman!”

(* Shri Ram is a Hindu God who lost his wife while hunting a deer and Salman Khan is the famed Indian actor who got into trouble with the law for hunting deer.)

Joke of the day-Romantic husband

Joke of the day-Romantic husband

When Arjun returned from office, his wife Anita asked, “Where are we going for summer vacations this year?”

Arjun was in a good mood and replied in a singing tone, “Jahan gham bhi na hon, aansoon bhi na hon, bas pyar hi pyar pale (Where there is no sorrow or tears, only love blossoms)”

Anita said immediately,”That’s just not possible. I am definitely coming with you.”